Stress and Relationships
Stress and relationships are an easy challenge to overcome but it takes both partners to want to overcome these obstacles.
Recipe for Relationships
Take a lot of love, honesty, loyalty, trust, pride, support, respect, and understanding, have
both partners mix these ingredients together, and then add a dash of playfulness and a pinch
of humility. Stir well until blended. Once blending is complete, have each partner add two
cups of communication to the bowl. Continue to stir for the duration of the relationship.
Let’s face it: It takes two to make a relationship, and both have to be willing to work on it for it to become unbreakable. We all want an enjoyable relationship that contains all of these ingredients, but it’s up to both partners as to what ingredients they are willing to add.
Stress and relationships become more of an issue after the first couple of years. Chances are when you first met your partner (or a past partner if you are currently single) there was some form of immediate attraction, usually but not all the time a physical attraction. This attraction prompted you to pursue this relationship.
Stress and relationships
"If today were perfect, there would be no need for tomorrow"
Through the first months of your relationship, you continued to find attributes of your partner that you truly admired. You enjoyed being alone to share time with each other. You talked for hours on end without boredom. This person made you relax and made you laugh. Stress and relationships may have existed but not in this one.
You couldn’t wait until the day’s end, when your separate paths would cross once again.
When the phone rang, and you heard that voice, picturing this person in your mind, you felt happy and content. So much of your life seemed right, and the thought of being in this person’s arms was a feeling of utopia.
This is natural in the beginning of any relationship. You
experience such feelings when you explore any new territory in your life.
Mystery and Anticipation awaited you....
Just like the child whose mind begins as a clear slate, you felt overwhelming emotions of excitement, wonder, and curiosity.
Then, as years went by, you may have shifted your focus to things that irritated you about this person. Perhaps this person is a procrastinator or is not as neat or organized as you would like them to be. Stress in relationships all of a sudden appear as you find yourself making comments that pronounce your frustrations.
More time goes by and you find that you’ve grown to be resentful. You find yourself retaliating in silence while other times you are defending your positions and beliefs of how you feel things should be done.
Your life was once surrounded by joy, laughter, and happiness. How could you have gotten along so well for so long with this person and now feel that everything has changed?
Stress and Relationships Collide
Since we all live with stress every day, stress and relationships go hand in hand. You are not the only one harboring these feelings. Don’t worry. Everything evolves and changes but mostly in these cases it is your perception that has changed and that can be reversed
or at the least altered.
At these crossroads of dealing with stress in relationships we need to place our focus on rekindling those feelings of desire and work on setting those negative feelings on a shelf…a high shelf.
Take away for an instant all the negative things you dwell on that concern your partner. Relax…then think of the first months that you spent together. Close your eyes, take your time and think of the places that you used to go together and the things that you use to do.
Do you remember those feelings of strong attachment that you felt and the yearning you had in your heart just to be in the same proximity of your partner?
These feelings have never left you.
You have piled on all of your negative thoughts until you successfully buried the feelings of excitement and wonder.
You have unintentionally stunted the growth of your relationship.
You chose your partner as the person you wanted to share your life’s experiences with. It’s not intended to be all glitter and romance it’s meant to be about sharing, growth and emotional support.
We can acknowledge that both partners have their own faults when it comes to stress and relationships.
We are human and this is expected, but you can’t let them take over the relationship or they will smoother it.
Use communication to reignite the love you buried inside. The rest will follow. Every relationship needs stimulus to keep it
My personal recommendation is to create a romantic atmosphere at home with a fireplace - they have electric or gel fireplaces if you don't have a real one. These can be used over and over again to spark some romance. I have had one for at least 7 years and I always know I can create a romantic evening on a whim, pull out some wine light some candles and set them on the table then light a fire in the fireplace - instant romance just add water (kidding about the water that's a different recipe but the fireplace works wonders) Save the money from outings and snuggle up together, have dinner, a glass of wine, a little talk and a lot of laughter.
Take the time to do something for you to bring this enjoyment back into your life.
Other Related Links:
Adult separation anxiety
Conscious and Subconscious thought